The Wide Awake Cafe » Cowardly Lion on Meet The Press

Mr. Russert: “Welcome, Mr. Lion.”

Mr. C. Lion: “Nice to be here. Thank you.”

Mr. Russert: “Mr. Lion. In the past few years you’ve been known for your, shall we say, bombastic support for the War on Terror. Supposin’ you met Osama bin Laden?”

Mr. C. Lion: “Why, I’d thrash him from top to bottomen!”

Mr. Russert: “What if I told you he’s standin behind you?”

Mr. C. Lion: “I’d fight him with my eyes closed! Oh — pulling an axe on me, eh? Trying to trick me, eh?”

Mr. Russert: “It’s no trick Mr. Lion. I was just checking to see how far you would go in support of the War on Terror.”

Mr. C. Lion: “Which one of em first? I’ll fight em all together if you want! I’ll fight em with one paw tied behind my back! I’ll fight em all standing on one foot!”

Mr. Russert: “Mr. Lion. It’s now been three plus years since the war in Iraq began. We’re now in a quagmire. Are you willing to take up arms yourself and join the fight in Iraq?”

Mr. C. Lion: “No.”

Mr. Russert: “Why is that Mr. Lion?”

Mr. Lion: “What makes the sphinx the seventh wonder?
Courage!
What makes the dawn come up like thunder?
Courage!
What makes the Hottentot so hot?
What puts the “ape” in apricot?
What have they got that I ain’t got?”

Mr. Russert: “I don’t understand Mr. Lion. What are you trying to say?”