When I was a teenage babysitter, one of the coolest kids I babysat for was a whimsical and funny, five year old boy. John always came up with the funniest comments and questions. One day he said, “I can’t see my eyes.” I answered, “Well, I can see your eyes.” He responded, “I can’t see my eyes. I must not have any eyes.” I took him to a mirror and pointed out his eyes. He said, “That’s not really my eyes. That’s a mirror.” And on and on. He grew up to be a doctor.

I was reminded of John the other night when I was writing my post, “A Surge of Joy.” We had experienced such a wonderful weekend and I had waited until very late to do my blogging about it. It was a long post and I found it hard to edit myself.

As I was about to hit “publish” suddenly the blog disappeared. Just a white page and finally, the “page can’t be displayed window.”

Luckily, just before I started to publish, I copied everything. Then it all disappeared. I pasted the post on Word and checked out the rest of the internet. I could view everything.

Tired and disappointed, I went to bed.

I couldn’t see my blog the next morning although everything else on the internet loaded properly. I went to work.

Later, that afternoon I turned on the computer hopefully.

I still couldn’t see my blog.

Now, I’ve been very busy lately and haven’t posted as avidly on my blog. Some days when I did have the time I didn’t have the words. Or, I had too many words and couldn’t organize my thoughts.

But, this was getting annoying. My husband had installed a new security system on my computer and in the back of my mind I wondered if it had caused the problem. I emailed the wonderous and talented, Sadie of Agent Bedhead and Apothegm Designs. She got right back to me and reported that she could see my blog. She gave me some technical advice. I contacted the host for my blog and they got back with me telling me they could see my blog and my account was current.

I emailed Sissy Willis and asked her if she could see my blog. She could.

Apparently everyone in the world could see my blog (well the few who actually look) except for me.

Was I being punished by the blog gods for my sins of commission or omission? Were they telling me that it was time to put away childish things and go do the dishes?

I began to wonder when my family who lives in the same city I do could also view my blog.

My husband, who is an action man, heard my sighs of woe and started discussing the issue with me. He tried to view the blog on his computer. He couldn’t. At least I finally wasn’t alone. We checked the laptop downstairs and we could see the blog.

I had proof that it was still there but couldn’t login on the laptop to write because the wireless was too weak.

I suggested that the new security system might be causing the problem but after we turned it off we still couldn’t see Wide Awake.

I started the dishes, folded a load of clothes and cleaned the downstairs bathroom. A lot of housework gets done around here when I am upset or frustrated. I wanted my blog back. I am a blogger. Take my blog away for a day and I’m back to doing housework. The floors get too freaking clean. We can’t have that.

Plus, I wanted to comment on the news of the day. I heard Rush Limbaugh on the radio last week during a break in my classroom as he was discussing the phony soldiers issue. He said nothing wrong. His intent was not to criticize active duty soldiers who are against the war. I am outraged by the attack on him by Hillary Clinton’s Media Matters and Democrat senators. Rush has done a lot in his support for the troops not only in words but also in deed. When my son deployed to Iraq, Rush adopted him, giving him free 24/7 for the year he was gone. Rush helped to uplift me during the entire year my son was gone with his insightful world view. (A world view that the Democrats want to silence)

Now, I felt silenced. The Wide Awake Cafe was sleeping or perhaps, was in a coma.

My husband called our internet provider.

After an hour and a half on the phone Bob determined that the reason I couldn’t view or operate my blog was a bad router.


Bob messed around with the router and brought the blog back. I hugged him and through the ether, hugged my blog. I published A Surge of Joy.

I can see my blog. I can post on my blog. Simple happiness.